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fall then winter - a cancer memoir

by Sam Wessels

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Guthie
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Kathie Wessels
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1.
Bohemian tale '07 - 1 month before 02:12
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2.
Snow in spires '07 - 1 week after diagnosis, start heavy chemotherapy 02:36
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3.
I remember this '08 - 1 month. Remission. 02:30
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4.
Steroid waltz '08 - 3 months 02:27
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5.
Playing baseball '08 - 8 months. End of heavy chemo, begin maintenance chemo 02:10
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6.
A few leaves left '08 - 10 months 03:14
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7.
First snow '08 - 1 year 04:48
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8.
Love again '09 - 1.5 years 02:34
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9.
In and out '09 - 1.5 years 03:39
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10.
Last of our kind '10 - 2 years 04:04
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11.
The camps '10 - 2.5 years 02:54
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12.
Devin's theme '11 - 3.5 years. End of all chemotherapy. 02:38
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13.
Everything's okay '11 - 4 years 04:54
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14.
Inversion still '12 - 4.5 years 02:46
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15.
Get it right '12 - 4.5 years 04:32
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16.
Still waiting '12 - 4.8 years 03:32
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17.
So it's winter again '12 - 5 years "cured" 02:56
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about

As of December, 2012 I have been in remission from leukemia for five years, which is considered cured. Cancer completely changed my story in awful and wonderful ways. Improvising and recording music on the piano was one of the few outlets I had.

The songs on the album appear in chronological order with the year and time since diagnosis labelled on each. Five years of music. Every year since I was diagnosed. I actually wrote almost three hundred songs during this time, but I picked 17 that captured the essence of my evolving life the best. Each song is like an aural journal entry, detailing the emotional realities that occurred throughout the raging turbulence of chemotherapy and recovery.

This album is a celebration of the life and beauty that hides in all tragedy and loss. It's good studying music, cleaning music, and alone music.

From my heart to yours, thanks so much for listening, and I hope it gives you an outlet as well, like it did for me.

credits

released December 14, 2012

Sam Wessels, Piano

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sam wessels Salt Lake City, Utah

I started playing piano at the age of four, begging my mom to let me take lessons, even though I couldn't read yet. I learned to read music before I could read english. Writing and improvising music has always been an intensely personal experience, but the time has come to share it. ... more

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